Sunday, July 14, 2013

So Many Emotions

I leave in 37 days. I am filled with so many emotions. So many that my mind has a hard time resting. I want to jump up and down and scream, I am so excited. I want to throw up, I am so nervous. I become giggly because I don't know what to think. I freeze because I am overwhelmed. I cry because I am so blessed.

The more I think about all the emotions that fill my body, I realize the one that is the strongest and the one that drives the others is the feeling of gratefulness. I can't wrap my mind around how blessed I am, but I know that I am very blessed. I am grateful to have the time and health to have an opportunity to do this. I am blessed to have multiple communities to support me through prayer and in financial ways. I am grateful to have my parents support and walk with me on every journey that I make. I am grateful to know that they will do what they can to help me accomplish my goals. I am blessed to have my parents encourage me and stand with me through the joys and struggles that I face as I approach this year. I am blessed to know that God is with me through every step in this process. I am thankful to know that He will not leave my side as I try to do His will and follow His call. I am grateful to have space to respond to a call like this, to be able to live out this type of ministry, to grow in my own faith. I am grateful to know people who will listen to all of my fears and joys. I am blessed to know people who can help give me vocabulary to describe what I feel, what I need, what I don't understand and what I can't know yet. I am unbelievably blessed and when I start to think about this truth all I can do is cry tears of gratefulness. Thank you all for blessing me with so much joy.

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